I'll come right out and say it: I don't like the Bloody Mary cocktail.
I've had plenty at different restaurants in different states, but frankly I'd rather just drink tomato juice and have a shot of vodka and a salad on the side. But if this blog demonstrates nothing else, it's that I'm open minded. If someone ever fixed me an elaborate Bloody Mary with Absolut Peppar and heirloom tomatoes and a foot-high garnish that's a shish kabob of shrimp, boiled eggs, and five different vegetables, I'd drink it and give it a fair chance.
In a recent issue of Saveur, there were a dozen different Bloody Mary recipes. Most were just variations on the same theme, but the Tomatillo Bloody Mary caught my eye. I like tomatillos and the rest of the fresh ingredients listed, and the recipe was just too damned weird to pass up. In the grand tradition of desperation recipes like Buffalo Wings, it seemed like the late night creation of a guy stuck with only a bottle of vodka and a jar of salsa verde.
And that's precisely what it is. In fact, just ditch the vodka and you've got a really delicious salsa verde. It's too thick to drink easily, and while I like the flavor well enough, it isn't really refreshing or relaxing like a cocktail should be. After just a few sips I felt like I'd been doing shots of pulpy wheatgrass juice down at the smoothie bar, trying to humor a pretty vegetarian chick. (Ah, to be 22 again...)
Maybe it would work better as a weird amuse bouche before dinner--call it a cold vodka green tomato soup, for instance. Frankly I'm thinking that this recipe was either a cruel joke in the style of Penn & Teller's Swedish Lemon Angels or an unfortunate Nihilartikel.
Final verdict: I still don't like the Bloody Mary. If anyone has the perfect recipe that will convert me, feel free to post it in the comments and I might tackle this topic again in a few months. It's going to take a while to get the taste of green salsa and grass clippings out of my mouth.